


Whumptober 2020 15 Science Gone Wrong

by frankie_mcstein



Series: Whumptober 2020 [15]
Category: Magnum P.I. (TV 2018)
Genre: Car Accidents, Dubious Medical Techniques, Gen, Minor Injuries, Undercover Ops, Whumptober 2020, probable medical inaccuracies, psychology inaccuracies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:27:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27025039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frankie_mcstein/pseuds/frankie_mcstein
Summary: Whumptober 2020 prompt 15- Science Gone Wrong"My name is Thomas Magnum. I used to believe that I had been a SEAL. I had a flimsy grasp on reality."Vets are dying in a private hospital and Magnum goes undercover to find out why, only to find he may be the next victim.
Series: Whumptober 2020 [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947172
Comments: 14
Kudos: 39





	Whumptober 2020 15 Science Gone Wrong

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know quite where this came from. It does feature a medical experiment but there is no squick I can think of.

_ My name is Thomas Magnum. I used to believe that I had been a SEAL. That I had left the military after my friends and I were held in a POW camp for over eighteen months. That I was working as a P.I. and living in a luxury estate owned by Robin Masters, maybe you've heard of him? I used to believe we were friends. Well, acquaintances maybe.  _

_ Yeah, I know, pretty crazy things to believe, right? That's not the half of it. I believed that my buddies from the forces, Rick and T.C., were living here with me. That I had a business partner who I was constantly at odds with. That she owned two dogs who hated me. That I had made friends with a detective with the HPD.  _

_ I also believed that Rick just happened to be one of the most connected people on Oahu. That T.C. just happened to own a helicopter touring company which gave him permission to fly over the city. That Higgins, my business partner, just happened to be an ex-spy. _

_ What's that you're saying? That's a lot of convenience and coincidence? Yeah, you're right; I should have known something didn't add up. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let me take you back to the beginning. _

_ You'll have to excuse the storyline, I had something of a flimsy grasp on reality at the time. But, to my mind, this is how the story starts. _

…

"I'm sure that Dr. Merk is behind it." Ozymandias 'Please Just Call Me Oz' Clark was looking frantic as he spoke. "Four patients in the past seven weeks, all gone."

Higgins had run a background check on the young man when he had first contacted them. He worked as an orderly in Lake-Side Psychiatric Hospital, a privately funded clinic that specialized in the treatment and rehabilitation of members of the armed forces who had experienced severe psychological trauma. The majority of the funding was provided by Mr. Francis Henry, the heir to an oil fortune and golden son of the Hawaiian Islands.

Magnum and Higgins exchanged an uncomfortable look before Higgins spoke.

"With the sort of trauma that the patients at Lake-Side are dealing with…"

But Oz cut her off. "It's always patients who are starting to respond to treatment and who don't have regular visitors. People with no family or friends to raise a fuss when they wind up dead."

"We'll look into it, Oz. If anything unethical is going on at Lake-Side, we'll find out what it is and put a stop to it. You have my word." Magnum didn't have to work to make his voice sound sincere; he wasn't sure he believed the accusations Oz was leveling against Lake-Side or Dr. Merk. But, in his book, anything involving servicemen getting mistreated deserved at least a cursory check. Going by the look on her face, he wasn't going to have to work to convince Higgins.

Of course, that was before he presented her with his plan.

“You want to go undercover as a traumatized serviceman in a clinic that just might be conducting illegal experiments on traumatized servicemen? Are you totally insane?”

“If I am, then I’m going to the right place.” Humor was absolutely the wrong approach, he knew it as soon as he said it. But it was too late to take it back.

“Magnum, please. I know it’s hard for you, but at least  _ try _ to think sensibly about this.” Higgins’ tone was flat and insulting, but her eyes were full of concern. “If you were to present yourself as a patient at Lake-Side, you would be held in isolation for the first week at the bare minimum. No visitors, no phone calls, no computer access… There would be no way for anyone to keep an eye on you or for you to get word out if you needed help.”

He couldn’t deny that she had a good point. But he also couldn’t think of a better plan.

“It’s not like either of us could successfully pose as staff for more than a few hours at best. And you know we’re gonna need more time than that.” He shrugged and carefully arranged his expression into one of solemn sincerity. “Besides, we don’t really believe this story, do we?”

“That’s no reason to leave yourself vulnerable in such…”

“Higgins.” He gave her a  _ look _ . “We have to look into this. But you and I both know that  _ this _ is nothing. Oz is probably getting too close to the patients and feeling guilty that they couldn’t be saved. Happens all the time to staff who work in these sorts of places.”

If Magnum were being totally honest, he wasn’t too happy about the week of enforced radio silence, but there was no way around it. Lake-Side insisted on it for all new patients, something about acclimatization. A lot of mental health professionals had praised the measure, and no exception had been made for any patient, regardless of the issues they were dealing with.

…

_ Yeah, I know, crazy story. Some big conspiracy, some sort of evil, unethical doctor as a bad guy... Doesn’t get more cliché than that, right? Like I said, flimsy grip on reality. You’re gonna have to bear with me though, because it doesn’t get any better any time soon. I mean, there’s no way I would have been able to convince a woman with a past as a spy that this was a good plan. She would never have gone for it. But, in my mind, I put forward a good argument and she went for it and I went in to Lake-Side. _

_ Now, in my delusion, the paperwork was all faked by Higgins. And it included a condition that my personal physician be allowed access to help with my physical issues. I know, I know, no one is ever allowed to be an exception to the ‘no contact with the outside world’ rule. Well, my mind had the answer to that too; Lake-Side was a mental health facility, so patients who required help with physical conditions were turned away. Yeah, sounds like the sort of thing that would spark protests. But you’re forgetting that Lake-Side is a privately funded hospital; they can take or refuse whomever they like. _

_ So why would they take me? Because of my record. Remember the POW camp I mentioned earlier? Well, the fake papers Higgy drew up made a big deal of the American hero aspect. Phrases like 'unendurable physical and emotional torment' made me a dream candidate for a place like Lake-Side, but things like 'permanent decreased mobility' meant they would need to allow someone else access to me. _

_ In my fantasy, and yes, I know now that’s what it all was, Higgins had done it quite deliberately, without checking with me, in the hopes that I would be refused admittance. Instead, she, or rather Dr. Harrison, got a call from Lake-Side a few hours later saying they were sure they could help her patient and were happy to accommodate her need for daily access.  _

_ Hello again, coincidence.  _

…

"I know it's been three days, but it's not really all that clear right now." Magnum was keeping his voice low while Higgins slowly and carefully pushed against his arm, putting on a good show of manipulating the limb without actually putting any pressure against it. "Other patients have said some stuff about people dying who should never have died.” He shifted slightly, putting a grimace on his face. “Oz switched my sleeping tablets out for sugar pills again, and I went for a walk after lights-out. I heard one of the nurses talking about a patient being transferred who should have been close to being discharged." 

Higgins shifted her grip on Magnum's arm and closed the space between them. To the nurse and two orderlies who were observing- "For your safety, Doctor Harrison. I'm sure you're aware of how sudden violent outbursts can be."- it looked as though she was simply performing some basic physiotherapy.

"Push back as hard as you can," she instructed in her fake American accent. "Don't forget to breathe." Then she moved her head, as if adjusting her stance to better serve her patient, and brought her face a little closer to Magnum's. "So you think Mr. Clark may actually be on to something?" she whispered, not liking the way the one orderly was moving closer to them.

"I'm not sure," he breathed back, then, much louder, "This is really starting to hurt, Doc!" 

"Really, Lieutenant, you know that's a good thing. It means your muscles are engaging, working. It's progress."

"It sucks."

"It's necessary."

The orderly took a few steps back again, apparently satisfied with their show. The nurse, who had glanced up from his paperwork at Magnum's raised voice, looked back down again as the orderly stepped back and the 'physiotherapy' continued, unaffected by the patient's complaints.

Ten minutes or so later, Higgins was being escorted out of the clinic by the nurse while the two orderlies took Magnum back to his room so he could rest before dinner.

"I have to say, I was skeptical about the claims of Doctor Wendle." Higgins very carefully didn't make eye contact with Nurse Kai. "But everything I've seen so far has really changed my mind." Now she looked over at the man, admiration in her eyes, and saw he was smiling.

"Yeah, this is a fine place all right. The people who come here are so broken, it's hard sometimes to imagine them ever being put back together." It was clear by his voice that Kai was proud of his job and the work the clinic was doing. But there was something, some hint of an emotion in his voice, that didn't ring true. 

"It must be hard, working with a patient group with such a high suicide risk." Higgins' voice was full of sympathy, her eyes soft and understanding, and she had to step down hard on the surge of excitement as Kai's face darkened.

"Yeah," he muttered under his breath, "if that's what kills them." They were nearly at the gate, where 'Dr. Harrison' would leave her visitor's badge and Nurse Kai would sign her out. She had to move fast, take advantage of the opportunity that had presented itself before it slipped away. So she stopped walking and turned to face Kai.

"Are you implying my patient could be in danger?" She kept her body relaxed, her voice casual and low. To anyone watching, the nurse at the far end of the corridor, the men monitoring the camera feeds in the security office, the guard sitting at the gate, it would look like they were simply finishing a friendly chat. 

Kai had the good sense to keep his face turned down towards her, hiding his expression from any observers.

"I'm not saying anything." But he was. With his tone of voice, his expression, his body language, he was screaming that there was something wrong. He nearly flinched as Higgins put her hand on his arm.

"I've heard other people talking. I don't work here. I'm not dependent on this clinic for my paycheck or afraid of the Board of Directors." She smiled as she spoke, despite the seriousness of her words, hoping to make herself appear trustworthy. "If there's something you need to tell me…" She trailed off, knowing if she pushed too hard she would scare Kai off, and waited to see if he would decide if he could trust her. She met his gaze directly and didn't blink.

"I've been watching you with that lieutenant. You really care about him." He glanced around, checking there was no one near enough to over hear him. When he looked back to Higgins, his eyes were frantic and his words were rushed. "Something weird is going on. I can't talk about it here. Too risky. Can we meet?"

Higgins took a split second to consider it; meeting him could be dangerous. If he had realised she wasn't a doctor, that Magnum was just playing a role, this could all be an act and it could be a trap. On the other hand, Kai worked closely with patients and staff and could have vital information. Higgins thought of Magnum, alone except for her once daily visits, no way of communicating with anyone if something were to go wrong, and she gave a quick nod.

"Of course. Do you know La Mariana?" The pair started walking back towards the gate where the guard had been giving them increasingly curious looks. Higgins made a point of raising her voice slightly as she said "Seven-thirty tonight then. It's a date," and felt a rush of relief as the man rolled his eyes and gave a small shake of his head.

She gave Kai a wave as she walked through the gate, playing up the 'two-hormonal-idiots-flirting' angle as best she could. Kai managed to grin at her in return, and Higgins felt a little of the anxiety she was feeling ease off. If something was going on and anyone suspected Kai was about to start causing problems, it would put the man in serious danger. If Kai could just keep up the act for the next few hours, no one would suspect anything.

_ 'Unless he's playing you and  _ you're _ the one in danger,' _ her mind supplied, less helpfully than it probably intended. Higgins shook her head, reaching for her cell as she slipped into the Rover and scrolled to Rick's name. She was taking a chance meeting Kai, but having someone watching her back would take a lot of the danger out of the situation.

…

_ Yep, you're right. The fake papers worked, even though a clinic with such a prestigious background would do a lot more than a cursory background check before allowing anyone access. Pretty unbelievable. And then, my partner just happens to be escorted out by the one person in the clinic who knows something's up and wants to do something about it. Even more unbelievable. And this guy just decides, based on a few seconds of conversation, that he's gonna trust her. Getting harder and harder to suspend your disbelief. _

_ And Higgins, a former MI6 operative, a woman with years of training and experience in keeping herself alive, figures, 'hey, you know what, meeting this guy is a chance I'm just gonna have to take.' I mean, sure, my mind was telling me she set the meet in the bar Rick owned- did I mention Rick ever so conveniently owned a bar that made for a perfect meeting spot?- where she would have plenty of witnesses and backup on hand. But still, that's an overwhelming amount of convenient thought processes.  _

_ Well, no one ever accused me of being subtle. _

…

Higgins checked the mirror again as she waited for the call to connect. She was sure that red car was following her.

_ “Jules! Any news?”  _ Rick and T.C. had been as unimpressed with Magnum's plan as Higgins had been and waited anxiously for updates.

"He's still not sure, but he thinks there's definitely something odd going on." She glanced over to the mirror again, telling herself she was just being paranoid, but unable to stop herself from checking. For all that she would happily spend days at a time making fun of Magnum and his 'feelings,' her instincts had saved her far too often for her to ever discount them.

"I got to chatting with one of the nurses, chap by the name Kai. He seemed to think Lake-Side is up to something. He wanted to meet to discuss things later so I asked him to La Mariana."

_ "Good plan. I'll call T.C.; we can keep an eye out for trouble." _ Rick sounded pleased to finally have something to do, and Higgins understood the feeling; three days of Magnum being almost totally isolated had been playing on everyone's nerves.

She opened her mouth to tell Rick what time to expect her but swore instead as the red car she had been worried about suddenly surged forward and cut into the lane directly behind her.

_ "Jules? What's going on?" _ There was worry in Rick's voice now, the joy of a few seconds ago wiped out.

"Looks like our plan wasn't as airtight as we'd thought." It wasn't 'their' plan, the blame for it was still resting firmly on Magnum's shoulders, and none of them had ever thought it was solid. But, while she was watching someone in the car behind her lift a gun and point it in her direction, she could be generous.

Rick was shouting something, but she wasn't sure if he was talking to her or someone else, and she couldn't afford to give him any attention. 

The red car swerved violently, and Higgins yanked on her own steering wheel in response. The back window of the Rover shattered as a bullet tore through it, and she was suddenly more grateful than she could express that she hadn't let herself give Dr. Harrison a rich husband who had bought his wife a convertible Ferrari.

_ "Higgins! Was that a gunshot?"  _

Under different circumstances, it might have been amusing to hear Rick, the self-styled weapons expert of the group, asking whether a shot was really a shot. Knowing Rick, he probably had a few good guesses as to the type of gun it was. But the panic in his voice was worrying. 

The road ahead was clearing, and Higgins took advantage, pressing her foot down hard on the accelerator as a 'thud' told her at least one more bullet had been fired her way.

"Red car, looks like a Volkswagen. No plate on the front. Two men inside," she called out, hoping the call was still connected. "Whoever this is, they're obviously desperate. We're still in traffic; they could hit anyone." She slammed on the brakes as an idiot in a van decided to drift out of his lane. A quick turn on the wheel shifted her course enough that she could accelerate again, but the red car had gained an alarming amount in the brief moment she had slowed. 

It hit her suddenly, as she blew through a red light and hoped no one was too injured by the collision she heard behind her, that she didn't stand too good a chance of getting away. The Ford was close enough for her to make out the wide eyes of the driver, and her mind raced frantically. She swerved again, feeling the wheel tug at her hands and nearly losing control. It sounded like Rick was arguing with someone.

"Someone needs to talk to Kai," she yelled, hoping to grab Rick's attention. "He'll be at the bar at half seven. And you need to get Magnum out of Lake-Side. He can't be safe there." She gasped at the sudden flash of pain as a bullet scorched a path along her arm. Her hand jerked, the Rover responded, and slammed into the back end of a bus.

For a second, as all four wheels left the road, Higgins thought she could still hear Rick. Then the Rover crashed down onto its side. She was unconscious before it rolled onto its roof.

…

_ The inevitable twist in the tale- the brave duo are discovered, their wonderful plan ruined. One is taken out of the equation, leaving the other in danger. You know, all old, overused tropes. You’re really going to have to pay close attention now. This is where things start getting a little more complicated. _

_ This is where I start to embrace reality for the first time in countless years. From here on out, everything starts to fall apart. _

...

Magnum wasn’t too bothered when the orderlies came in with over half an hour still to go before dinner. There were all sorts of reasons why staff would be checking on patients. But when they walked over to him and stood, arms crossed like they were trying to look intimidating, that was mildly concerning. Footsteps at the door made him crane his neck to look past them, and he saw Dr. Merk walking in.

“Lieutenant Magnum,” the doctor greeted, a smile that looked oddly strained on his face. “How was today’s physiotherapy?”

“Painful.” Magnum snapped the word, playing up the aggression he had been ‘diagnosed’ with. “Why?” He managed to make the single word sound belligerent. 

Dr. Merk blinked and sighed heavily, like a man about to deliver some bad news. Magnum narrowed his eyes, unease starting to stir in his gut. Something was wrong.

“We just received word that Dr. Harrison was involved in a small accident after she left here earlier.” Dr. Merk held up his hands as Magnum made to stand up, and the orderlies each unfolded their arms, ready to push him back down if they needed to. “She’s just fine,” he soothed. “She was clipped by a motorcycle and a few bumps and bruises is all. But it does mean she won't be able to attend your treatment tomorrow.”

Magnum felt the bad feeling grow, surging through him. Merk was lying, he knew it. But he wasn’t sure what he was lying about. Had ‘Harrison’ been hurt worse than he was saying? Or was the entire story a fabrication? A movement caught his eye, and he looked around to see one of the orderlies pulling a needle out.

“Now, Lieutenant, this does of course mean you can’t stay here at Lake-Side. But don’t worry, we have a sister facility where I think you will be very comfortable.” And Merk grinned, a cold-looking smile that didn’t reach his eyes. He kept smiling the entire time Magnum was struggling with the orderlies, but they were big men, his seated position put him at a disadvantage, and it didn’t take long for the syringe to slide into his neck.

The orderlies let him go, and he slumped to the floor, unable to stop himself from falling. He blinked up at Merk as he leaned over him, struggling to listen to what the man was saying.

“Good night, Private Investigator Magnum. I’m sorry your partner can’t be here to join us. But my men were a little overzealous in their attempts to capture her.”

Magnum didn’t even have time to panic over what that meant; his eyes closed, and he was gone. He didn’t feel his arms being pulled into a straight jacket or his body being lifted roughly to a gurney where a sheet hid the old-fashioned restraint from curious eyes. He was wheeled quickly through to the basement and along to an old door, partially hidden behind boxes, that opened out into the delivery bay. An ambulance was waiting, engine idling, back doors open.

Magnum was loaded into the back, Dr Merk climbing in along with him. The doors were closed, the ambulance pulled off, and the orderlies went back inside the clinic. There was still twenty minutes until dinner was served, which meant that, by the time Oz noticed that Magnum was missing, he was already strapped to a bed in an old cabin and was just starting to wake up.

He tugged reflexively against the straps pinning his wrists and ankles to the uncomfortably hard bed, feeling the padded cuffs scratching against his skin. There was an odd sensation in his right hand, and he tilted his head to see an IV tube snaking up to a bag hanging above his head. This was really not good. He tugged again, tensing his arms and pulling, feeling his muscles burn at the strain but not making any impression on the velcro straps.

“Now now, Mr. Magnum.”

The voice made Magnum jump; he hadn’t noticed anyone else in the room with him and peered into the corner where the voice had come from. 

“Please try to relax. You know it makes things harder on you if you struggle.” Dr. Merk stepped forward and gave Magnum an appraising glance before looking at the tablet he was holding. He tapped the screen a few times, slid his finger upward, tapped again. Magnum watched in silence, pretty sure Merk was just killing time and hoping Magnum would talk first. He was sure he had heard Merk call him a P.I. before he had blacked out and desperately wanted to ask about Higgins-  _ ‘Harrison,’ _ his mind corrected.  _ ‘You don’t know that he knows about her.’ _ \- but he also felt a little fuzzy, as if the memory of those few moments after he’d been drugged weren’t entirely trustworthy.

As Merk continued to ignore Magnum and fiddle with whatever was on his tablet, Magnum passed the time by looking around the room he was trapped in. It looked like a big standard hospital room, a bright light reflecting off the startling white walls with a folding privacy screen stood up against the far wall. He tipped his head to peer at the floor and saw a dull green tile, easy to clean and hard to stain, typical for a room where you might expect blood, vomit, or other fluids to be hitting the floor. A turn of his head, and he was looking at the only window in the room, blocked by thick bars. He slumped back a little as he realized that, even if by some miracle he did manage to get out of the restraints, he wasn’t going to find it easy to get out of the room.

“Well, shall we get started with today’s session?” Dr Merk took a step to the right and sat on a chair, crossing his legs and giving Magnum his undivided attention. “Why don’t we start with this fantasy partner of yours? Higgon, wasn’t it?”

“Higgins.” Damn, he hadn’t meant to answer that. But, now that he had said something, Magnum couldn’t seem to control his tongue. “And, believe me, she is no one’s fantasy of a partner. She’s stubborn and argumentative and…”

“But she  _ is  _ a fantasy.” Dr. Merk gave a small encouraging smile as Magnum pulled a face at him. “Yesterday we came close to a breakthrough I feel.” He looked back at his tablet. “Ah, yes, here we are. You were getting this Higan person confused with another character in your delusion, a doctor of some sort.”

“It’s Higgins. And she  _ is  _ a doctor. I mean, she’s posing as one.” What was he doing? Why was he telling this guy everything? “We needed a way for someone to keep an eye on me while I was undercover in Lake-Side so she…”

“So she somehow figured out a way to fool an unknown number of actual medical personnel? Does she have a medical background?” Merk waited patiently while Magnum, trying to figure out what was going, slowly shook his head. “So, how do you suppose she managed to pull this off?”   
  
“She uh… she used to work undercover…” But it felt wrong as he was saying it and Magnum trailed off, looking at the wall behind Merk. Higgle was real, he knew that. At least, he thought he knew that. Wait, wasn’t her name Higgins? Yes, Higgins, that was it. And she was very much real. But his head felt so thick, his thoughts so slow, that he couldn’t think of why he was so sure that she was real. Was it really likely that he would just happen to meet up with someone with the training and skills necessary to help him?

“Mr. Magnum, I’ve been holding off on telling you this for several weeks now, but it seems to me that you’re questioning the fantasy world you’ve created for yourself, and I think you may be ready to hear it.” Merk leaned forward and fiddled with the IV for a second. When he sat back, professional concern radiating off him, Magnum felt a rush of lightheadedness and a wave of fatigue came crashing down over him.

“I take no pleasure in telling you this. But your life as you know it does not exist.” Merk paused, and Magnum forced his eyes to open, to focus on the man’s face.

“You’re… you’re not…” But his brain didn’t seem to want to work.

“Your best friend was declared MIA after serving several years in the SEALs. It was later discovered that he was captured and held for over a year in a camp for POWs before he was executed.” Merk was holding Magnum’s gaze. “Your mind simply couldn’t handle it. At first you simply tricked yourself into believing your friend had come home. But, as time went on, you became increasingly involved in your delusion and, eventually, you put yourself in his place.”

No. This was nonsense. He had been in the camp. He had escaped, moved to Oahu. Started a business and partnered with Hig… Higgot?… He lost his train of thought. 

"This really is for your own good, Mr. Magnum. You can't get better until you start to deconstruct this fantasy world you've built in your head.” Merk leaned forward in the chair. “Why would you have been held as a prisoner of war if you're a P.I.? And, if you're a soldier, why are you working as a P.I.? The delusion collapses under the slightest scrutiny."

"No... No the P.I. work came after the camp..." But Magnum wasn’t sure why he was insisting. Why would he  _ want  _ the camp to have been real? It was eighteen months of hell, pain and fear and guilt. Surely, if there was a chance that he hadn’t really suffered through that, he should be grabbing it with both hands?

"Yes.” Merk was still talking. “The P.I. business that you run with a woman who hates you. Now, tell me, Mr. Magnum, why would you want to spend all your working hours with a woman as argumentative and obnoxious as this Miss Higgston?"

"Higgins." At least, he thought that was her name. He was feeling worse as the seconds passed, struggling to find anything solid to grasp on to.

"I hardly think the name you've given her matters, do you? Surely, if you were to ask someone to be your business partner, it would be someone you enjoy spending time with? Someone who enjoys spending time with you?" The doctor’s voice was cold now, the words feeling almost like they were physical blows. 

Magnum tried to flinch away from them but the straps and cuffs stopped him. "But... We do..."

"You argue constantly. You are forever at odds with each other. Is that the attitude of two co-workers who respect each other? Care for each other? Or do you think it's your mind's way of trying to warn you that this is all in your imagination? A symptom of your illness." 

Magnum didn’t notice Merk reaching out for the IV again; his mind was spiraling down into a pit. Of course he hadn’t really been a SEAL. Of course he hadn’t really been a POW for all those months. It made perfect sense. It was all just make believe. Wasn’t it? Why else would every thing feel so far off and distant?

…

_ You see what I mean now, right? A few words of common sense, and everything I had believed for long just… fell apart. It’s weird how easily Dr. Merk pulled everything to pieces in front of my eyes. My service in the Navy, my friends, my time in the camp, my job as a private investigator… all just nonsense. _

_ And I would never have known it if Merk hadn’t managed to get through to me. The one doctor on all of the Hawaiian Islands who could break through the walls of delusion and actually reach the part of me that wanted to break free. _

_ Yet another happy coincidence. _

…

“What did Kai have to say?” Higgins was struggling to think clearly; between the concussion and the pain, her thoughts were refusing to come into focus properly. Her doctor had decided her concussion was too severe for her to have any decent painkillers, and she was fighting for every second of lucidity; all she really wanted to do was wail at the top of her lungs until she blacked out. But she knew Rick had kept her ‘date’ with the nurse and was anxious to know if anything interesting had come up. She fixed T.C. with a look that clearly told him not to even think about trying to avoid telling her what had happened. 

He sighed and shook his head, not happy about her trying to follow the case when she couldn’t even sit up. But he understood the drive that was pushing her; they were all worried about Magnum being alone.

“He was confused when Rick sat down instead of you. And he got real squirrelly when Rick told him about the crash. Tried to walk right back out.” He saw the concern written all over her face and reached out to put a hand on Higgins’ arm, but didn’t move fast enough to stop her from shifting in an abortive move to lift her head. What little color she had drained from her face, and T.C. squeezed her arm lightly, hoping to offer some comfort. Her doctor hadn’t wanted anyone in the room with his patient and had threatened to have T.C. removed at the first sign that his presence was causing problems.

“Easy, Higgy Baby, take a breath.” He watched as she closed her eyes, fighting against the wave of pain that was threatening to drag her under. “Breathe through it. Slow and steady,” he coached, long months of practice kicking in like muscle memory. 

One of the nurses had left a bowl of cold water with a face cloth on the table, and he reached for it with his free hand. Wringing the cloth with one hand wasn’t easy, but he didn’t want to let go of Higgins’ arm. He knew from experience how terrifying it could be to feel like you were being left alone with your pain. The cold cloth wiping gently over her face seemed to help chase away the last of the surge of agony, and she opened her eyes again, offering him a shaky smile.

“Thank you.” Her voice was quiet, full of strain.

“Lie still.” T.C. made sure it sounded like an order. “Kai said he’s noticed a string of deaths that, as far as he’s concerned, should never have happened.”

“That’s... Oz said… same...”

T.C. nodded, easily filling in the missing words. “According to Kai, all these patients had the same doctor.” He could see Higgins was flagging. Her eyes were only half-open and looked unfocused. “Rick’s taking him to talk to Katsumoto as we speak.”

Higgins' eyes slid closed, keeping them open was just too painful and too much like hard work. It was okay to fall asleep, she knew. And her doctor had even said she should try to get some sleep, that they would wake her up if they needed to. But something was stopping her from drifting away like she wanted.

“Magnum?” She hoped T.C. didn’t think she was confusing him for Magnum, that he understood she was trying to ask if he was safe. The pressure of T.C’s hand shifted and she realised he was patting her arm now.

“We still can’t get in to the clinic. Katsumoto’s trying to push some paperwork through official channels so they can’t keep stonewalling us.” He didn’t tell her that her phone, somehow still working after the crash, had beeped with a voicemail from Oz over an hour ago. How the young man had sounded frantic as he’d said that Magnum had been transferred earlier in the day and that he couldn’t figure out where the P.I. was now.

She didn’t need to know that, while T.C. was guarding her in case the men who had tried to kill her came back, Rick and an ‘old friend’ had gone to Lake-Side with the intention of breaking into their on-site database. She didn’t need to know they had found no mention of Magnum in any of the files. She didn’t need to know that Oz had been found dead less than a quarter of an hour ago, from what would have looked like a self-inflicted overdose, if it weren’t for the defensive wounds on his palms. 

The mention of Katsumoto being on the case seemed to have been the thing that convinced her it was okay to let go. T.C. felt guilty for not telling her the truth but also relieved that she was finally asleep. He let his facade fall for a moment, the stress and worry twisting his face. Then the door was pushed open, and he pushed back everything he was feeling in favor of jumping to his feet to glare at whoever was walking in. If it was the men from the red car coming back to try again to take Higgy from them, they were going to have a fight on their hands.

As it happened, it was a nurse, who wasn’t thrilled to see the look on his face but was happy to see Higgins had managed to drift off to sleep.

“Try not to disturb her,” she whispered, making a few notes on Higgins’ chart. “If she wakes up, try to engage her, but don’t try to keep her awake if she starts to fall asleep again. Okay?” And she pinned T.C. with a glare that told him she had him pegged as some sort of troublemaker.

“Yes, ma’am,” he agreed, offering a small smile as an apology for the way he had glowered at her before. She didn’t seem to care for the smile and spun on her heel, leaving T.C. with nothing to do until either Higgins woke back up again or someone called to say they had somehow found Magnum.

…

Magnum still felt awful. In fact he was feeling worse as time went on. His head pounded and his stomach kept rolling, and he was hopelessly exhausted. Merk had spent the entire night telling him all about how his brain had spent the last who knew how many years playing tricks on him and, every time Magnum had started to drift off to sleep, Merk had woken him up.

“You have to focus,” he would say, something like excitement in his tone. “You’re so close.”

“I already… know…”

But Merk wouldn’t let Magnum finish. “You may  _ know _ it’s all fake, but that’s only half the battle. You have to  _ believe _ it’s all fake.”

And that had proven to be something of a sticking point over the hours. Magnum had said that he hadn’t signed up to the Navy. That he hadn’t entered the SEALs or been captured or moved into Robin’s Nest or started a P.I. business or invited Higgins to be his partner. But then Merk had asked “whose birthday is in May?” and Magnum, still unable to control his tongue, had started telling him about the surprise party he and Higgins had planned for T.C. He’d gotten as far as listing the flavors of the different tiers of the cake before realizing that Merk was shaking his head.

“There was no party, Mr. Magnum. No cake, no balloons. Because there is no T.C.” He had stared at Magnum, eyes dark with some sort of emotion that Magnum couldn’t place. He almost looked happy, but that couldn’t be right.

Later Merk had asked him about Robin. Magnum had explained the plot of the first White Knight book in great detail, not even noticing when Merk had sighed. It wasn’t until Merk had pounded his fist against his own knee in a display of frustration that Magnum had stopped talking.

As the sun slowly rose, light streaming in through the window, Magnum tried to lick his lips. They felt cracked and sore.

“Can I… water?” he ground out past his slow breathing. At the silence that met his words, he forced his eyes open and saw Merk shaking his head.

“I’m sorry, I really am. But the drugs that you’re taking, the ones that are helping you to break free of your fantasy, don’t react well with dihydrogen monoxide.” He didn’t sound sorry. If anything, he just sounded distracted. 

Magnum ignored his stomach's protests and he kept his eyes open. He watched with a frown that was only partly caused by his headache as Merk fiddled with the IV yet again, switching the bag out for a new one. This was the fourth bag, if he was counting correctly. A cold feeling trickled along his arm as the clear liquid flooded the vein and the pain in his head surged. 

_ ‘Any time you wanna come rushing in guys, I won’t object.’  _ No, wait, that wasn’t right. Was it? Rick and T.C. weren’t going to come charging in through the door. Higgins wasn’t looking for him. Katsumoto wasn’t tracking Merk. They weren’t his friends, his ohana. They were just people he had passed in the street or seen at the store whose faces his sick mind had stolen.

But… He bit back a groan as the entire world seemed to wobble around him. Even with his eyes tightly closed and his jaw clenched shut, he was worried he was about to throw up. But he couldn’t stop thinking about his friends.

“None of them?” Even though his voice was quiet and shaky, Merk seemed to hear him.

“None of what?” He still sounded utterly disinterested, more focused on whatever he was typing on his tablet.

“My friends. Aren’t any of them real?” Magnum thought he sounded almost pathetic, like he was begging Merk to tell him he wasn’t alone in the world, that there was at least one person out there, somewhere, who cared for him. His vision blurred as Merk smiled, but he didn't think it was a sympathetic smile. It must have been a trick of the light, he decided, the way it looked so smug.

“Whatever friends you had, you drove them away a long time ago. You were placed in my care by the state several months back. I’ve been working with you ever since.”

Magnum’s entire body tensed. He forgot about the churning in his stomach, the blinding pain in his head. That wasn’t right. A few months ago? Higgins had been going back and forth between him and MI6 a few months ago. Why would he have imagined that? Why would his delusion, his own personal little fantasy world, have conjured up a scenario where she was considering leaving him?

He bit down hard on his tongue, wanting to ask Merk about it but knowing exactly what the doctor would say.

“It was your mind trying to warn you that none of it was real.” And his voice would be so smooth and so hard to ignore. “It was your sanity trying to regain control.”

And there was a chance that was true. That all the issues he’d faced, Zeus and Apollo hating him, Hannah showing back up, constant money issues, Hannah dying, Higgins thinking of leaving... they could all have been red flags, thrown up by a frantic brain that was struggling to deal with what it knew wasn’t real.

But it didn’t feel like the truth. At one point, when his eyes had been so itchy and heavy and his stomach had been cramping, Magnum had been almost sure that Merk was telling the truth. That he had suffered a loss and it had loosened his grip on reality. 

_ ‘My friend dies and it drives me mad, but my dad dying wasn’t an issue?’  _ The thought had been dripping with sarcasm and just thinking about it now seemed to clear his head a little. He forced himself to think back over the case. Traumatized members of the armed forces going into a clinic and turning up dead. Tragic. But the staff thought it was suspicious. 

_ 'Well _ ,' he amended,  _ 'one member of staff thought it was suspicious.'  _ And Oz had believed so strongly that something was wrong that he had hired a couple of P.I.s to look into it.

Or… had he? Was the entire case just another part of his fantasy? Just… a way of making himself the hero? Or was Merk the bad guy? Were the drugs in the IV somehow affecting his mind? Was this hospital room a fantasy? Was Merk even real? 

Magnum clenched his jaw and tried to force himself to breathe through his nose. His heart was beating faster, picking up speed with each thought that spiraled through his head. His breathing was getting shallower, setting up the start of a burn in his chest.

"Calm yourself, Mr. Magnum." Merk sounded slightly worried.

But Magnum couldn't calm down. He knew he was panicking, but he didn't know why. Was it the idea that his life was some half-baked dream? Or the idea that it was real? Was he struggling to catch his breath because Merk was right? Or because the doctor was a threat?

He felt a sharp pain in his right wrist, realized he was tugging desperately at the cuffs, and deliberately redoubled his efforts. He didn't care what was true, what was fake, who was real or made-up. All he knew was that he needed to get out of these restraints, off this bed, out of this hospital room. He needed to get away from Merk and his drugs and his truths and his lies. 

Magnum started kicking out, twisting his legs, bending and jerking his knees. He was out of breath, his heart still racing in his chest, his muscles burning. But he could see Merk picking up a syringe and knew, just  _ knew _ , that he needed to get away. 

"No!" he called out, trying to jerk his arm enough to dislodge the needle taped to his skin. "Stay away from me!" It wasn't the threat he wanted it to be; he was too frantic, too aware of how completely he was trapped. And Merk smirked at him and grabbed the IV tube, pressed the needle into it, and pressed the plunger. 

Magnum jerked his arm again, trying to pin the tubing so he could bend it, stop whatever it was that had been in the syringe from entering into his system. But he was already starting to feel hot, like a small fire had started in the crook of his arm and was rapidly spreading through his body.

"Sorry, Lieutenant," and, if Magnum had been able to take in enough breath, he would have crowed at Merk's admission that at least some of his claims were lies. "But you're no use to me any more."

He opened his mouth to say more, but the door flew open with a crash, part of the frame falling to the floor, and stopped him.

"HPD! Step away from the bed!" Katsumoto walked in, gun raised and pointed at Merk. 

Magnum glanced over and saw Rick following the detective through the door. His eyes tracked his friend as he slipped his gun back into his waistband and hurried across the room.

"What did he give you, Tommy? Do you know?" Rick checked Magnum's pulse with one hand and started tugging at the velcro straps with the other.

Magnum opened his mouth to answer, and Rick gave him an almost frightened look as a wheeze escaped instead of the words he was trying to say.

Magnum heard Rick saying something about an ambulance. That was good. He was starting to think he might benefit from medical attention. Everything was starting to look gray and move in slow motion. This was bad. He couldn't remember why exactly, but he was sure it was bad. 

"Stay with me, Tommy!" That was Rick. Wasn't it? Was Rick really there? Was Rick ever really there? He thought… maybe…

Magnum passed out long before the ambulance arrived.

…

_ Waking up in a hospital is never fun. You're either drugged or in so much pain you end up wishing you were drugged. The smell is annoying, the noises are distracting, the attitude of the staff is pretty hit or miss. _

_ But the worst part, for me at least, is the disorientation. You don't know for sure where you are- is it the big hospital in the center of town? The little place that's too small for an ED? Which floor are you on? Which room are you in?- and that can be pretty scary. You don't know for sure what's wrong with you and you have that split second between waking up and remembering, that tiny moment that feels like it's dragging on for a lifetime, when your memory refuses to kick in. Did you have a heart attack? Crash your car? Get kidnapped and drugged by some psycho who wanted you to believe your life was a lie? _

_ Hang on a minute. _

_ What was that last one again? _

_ Oh! _

Magnum sat bolt upright, a gasp tearing its way out of him. His hands were balled into fists, arms tense, shoulders locked, ready to fight. 

"Easy, Tommy."

He whipped his head around to find the source of the voice. He knew it wasn't Merk; for one thing, Merk would never have called him 'Tommy.' And he recognized the voice; that was a pretty big giveaway.

"You're real?" Well, that wasn't what he'd intended to say. He'd been going more for something like 'what the heck happened?' Or maybe 'was Merk telling the truth about Higgins being hurt?' He'd even have settled for a simple 'ow' given how badly his head was hurting. But, now that he'd asked, he needed to know the answer. He watched Rick open his mouth, thought of everything he had been through, all the things he had lost and gained, and decided in that moment that, if that was a delusion, he didn't care.

"I'm as real as you are." No joke, no smile, no teasing tone. Rick was being as serious as he knew how to be. 

"Higgy?"

A wince on Rick's face now; something  _ was _ wrong with her. Rick took a deep breath and gave Magnum a searching look, as if trying to decide how much to tell him.

Magnum simply waited patiently, and, after a few seconds, Rick started talking. Magnum listened as Rick talked him through the attempted shooting and resulting car crash.

"It was pretty bad. They found a small bleed on her brain from the impact, but they're hoping they won't need to operate. She's still not even allowed to sit up, and her doctor already warned her she'll be having vicious headaches for weeks. And that's all on top of the broken leg. T.C.'s keeping an eye on her." 

"What about Merk? Why did he… I mean, what was he doing?"

"I can answer that," Katsumoto said as he walked in, offering both men a nod. "He thought he was close to developing some breakthrough drug, something that would wipe out the memories of trauma-inducing incidents." His jaw worked for a second, anger flickering in his eyes. "He was using Lake-Side patients as test subjects because, as he put it 'they were so messed up, no one would care if a few of them died.' That's a direct quote, by the way."

There was heavy silence for a long moment, all three men disgusted by the words. It was broken by Rick's phone buzzing with a text.

"It's from T.C. Jules' latest scan shows the bleed on her brain is definitely slowing. No need for an op." The tension in the room drained away as relief replaced the men's anger.

Magnum shifted slightly, feeling his body protest. He was sure everyone would have something to say when he told them he'd started to believe they weren't real. Rick and T.C. would probably offer sympathy and support while Higgins would probably take the whole thing personally somehow.

He imagined her saying, "You couldn't possibly be imagining me, Magnum. You simply don't possess the necessary mental agility." Her face would be showing her displeasure, nose crinkled slightly and one eyebrow arched. Magnum smirked a little at the image. 

It was a funny sight, and he clung to it. As long as they were both confined to their beds, he would have to make do with picturing her reaction. But that was okay by him; he'd get to see it for real soon enough.

Katsumoto was explaining how the background check on Merk had revealed an ex-wife with property on the island. How that had led them to the old hunting cabin with the bedroom that had been kitted out as a hospital room.

Magnum let his eyes slip closed. Reality was exhausting; he needed a nap.

**Author's Note:**

> Poor Tommy. I don't know why I'm so mean to him. Except that it's fun lol.


End file.
